Meanwhile....

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Lumen: *wanders cheerily into the locker room with the female doll on the door, Desinex tossed over one shoulder* Aiiiin't no mountain high enough! Gooonnna take a baaaaath!

Desinex: *pounding on Lumen's back, and cussing him out soundly*

Lumen: *opens a locker. Then opens another* Aha! Soap. *heads for the showers, still singing nonsense*

Desinex: *More thumps on Lumen's back, is too cratered to leave proper dents, at least*

Lumen: *stands Auntie in the shower and starts to scrub her with the green soap. Has a bite of the soap as he works* Rub a dub dub, blubbity blub blub...

Desinex: *standing just shy of upright. Spots something that gets grabbed and inspected curiously*

Lumen: It's called shampoo. *sniff* Oooo, I remember that brand.

Desinex: ... What's it for?

Lumen: S'a slagging great mixer with that green energon that has the burnt rubber aftertaste.

Desinex: *looks intrigued, will have a taste of the shampoo now*

Lumen: See what I mean? It's got that cheap mango perfume flavor. *grins and scrubs her*

Desinex: *considering look before she nods and offers him the bottle*

Lumen: *has a swig and passes it back* Meh. It's got no kick though. It's just a sparklet drink like that.

Desinex: *Will close the bottle and stow it for later* We need the fun stuff. *Sagely nod*

Lumen: I saw some in that locker back there. *will scrub self now, and bellow songs about being sexy*

Desinex: Oh? *Will wobble over to look*

Lumen: Top shelf! It's in that pink aerosol can. *scrub and sing*

Desinex: *Up on her tiptoes, will snag the can described*

Lumen: *turns off the water and wanders in drying his skidplate with a big fluffy towel* Yeah, that stuff. *grin* It's got a good kick.

Desinex: *headtilt, is going to try and figure out how to get the good stuff out of the can*

Lumen: *drops towel on floor* Here, let me.

Desinex: *Will hand the can over*

Lumen: *sticks a little punch out of one finger like a claw, punctures the can and then sticks the hole to his mouth as the contents fizz out*

Desinex: Hey!!! *Will find another can, or try to, since she just remembered that she's got claws too*

Lumen: *hand on her head to hold her still, and then puts the can to her mouth once it's stopped fizzing and tips her head back*

Desinex: *Pleased sounds as she gets a taste of the liquid*

Lumen: *big grin, will feed Auntie everything left in that can* See what I mean?

Desinex: *nod nod, grinning and rolling her shoulders a bit*

Lumen: *tosses can and looks in that locker* Hey! Cheap slag vitamin E hand lotion! *grabs bottle and squirts the contents into his mouth*

Desinex: *wobbles over to check other lockers as well*

Lumen: *tosses the empty bottle and starts to systematically ransack the lockers with a speed and skill that tells of much practise*

Desinex: *Has found several cheap body sprays of various flavors*

Lumen: *is amused that nearly every locker here has something smelly in it. Tosses her a baby powder deodorant stick, then chugs down a bottle of cheap perfume*

Desinex: *curious sound*

Lumen: *BRAAAAAAAAAAAP* *tosses the bottle aside and then looks at Desinex*

Desinex: *Inspecting the deodorant stick and having a taste*

Lumen: *big grin* It's good when you just crunch up the whole thing, too. Like this. *grabs another one and chows it down* Uh... bleah. Magnolia.

Desinex: *Snerks, then has a bite of the deodorant*

Lumen: *body spray can with Miley Cyrus on it. Punches a hole in it and drinks some, then offers the rest to Auntie*

Desinex: *Has a taste, and then she's gagging*

Lumen: o.0 No?

Desinex: *Headshake, all but shoves the can back into his hands*

Lumen: Huh. *reaches into another locker and finds Bodyshop Satsuma body spray* Bleah. This is only good for air freshener. *perks and pulls out another lotion bottle* Here, this'll cut the taste!

Desinex: *checking over the rest of her finds in an effort to find something more palatable* *looks up, blink blink*

Lumen: Open your mouth. *pops the top on the lotion bottle and then aims it*

Desinex: *complies*

Lumen: *fills her mouth full of the cheap and very tasty lotion. Then has a shot himself*

Desinex: *Pleased sounds*

Lumen: *offers her more*

Desinex: *Opens her mouth again*

Lumen: *feeds her a bit more, but then pauses to fill a big cup from one locker with different body sprays and perfumes, then garnishes the drink with a heap of the lotion*

Desinex: *is a happy Decepticon. Doesn't realize that this time when she tipped her head back to have more of the lotion, her visor retracted to reveal just what a mess her optics are with their broken glass and damaged settings*

Lumen: *makes himself a different drink and knocks it back, then dances around pounding on his chest and shaking his booty. Yup, he's smashed*

Desinex: *will raid a few more lockers, making an interested sound when she comes across something she wasn't expecting* Pigment powders!

Lumen: What? Lemme see? Ohhhhh. Eye shadow! This stuff's great! *goes a raiding again*

Desinex: *grinning and raiding more lockers, hoping to find more colors, as she thinks Lumen would look good with some decoration*

Lumen: *over there by the end locker. Has found a glittering cobalt blue and is using it to accent his badge and his scars* :3

Desinex: *Has found some brown, which gets set aside for later. Has also found some silvery grey. Will bring both over to Lumen, and set to work decorating the mech*

Lumen: Not too much now. I'm not a femme. *grins and uses his thumb to apply a stripe of the glittering brown between Desinex's optics and up onto her forehead*

Desinex: Oh, hush. *is decorating part of the old frontliner's plating with Decepticon battle markings, the designs carefully done from memory and by guesswork. When she's finished, there are several carefully but imperfectly drawn markings done in the silver she found, and his finish has a few scratches from her claws, though she tried to be careful*

Lumen: *looks at them, his chin tucked down as his browplates raise slowly* *softly* ...Slaaaaaag. I'd nearly forgotten about those.

Desinex: They went out of use in your time?

Lumen: *takes his blue, and that brown, and adds just enough body butter to make the pigments more workable, then starts to decorate the blue femme* I'm over eleven million years old, Desi. A lot of things have gone out of use in my time.

Desinex: *Very soft snort*

Lumen: Don't snort. I'm decorating that. *rumble of a burp*

Desinex: :P

Lumen: *makes the designs perfectly, and then accents her scars so that they're objects of beauty* There you go.

Desinex: *Small smile* Thanks, Lu....

Lumen: *grins and then reminds her of her lotion topped drink before slipping past her and grabbing that bottle he saw hidden in the vent!*

Desinex: *Will turn her attention to the drink, making pleased sounds as she tastes it*

Lumen: *reads label of bottle* Amarula? Kiddie drink. *tips the big bottle up and chugs*

Desinex: *absently humming something she picked up somewhere as she thinks about what to do next*

Lumen: *lowers bottle and burrps, then grins at her* Let's go see what 'Mia's got to drink!

Desinex: Mmkay... :3

Lumen: *checks to see if her drink is all gone*

Desinex: *has mostly finished off her drink*

Lumen: Hey, I'll give you some of this once that's all gone. *offers her his arm as he turns toward the door*

Desinex: *Perks and finishes off the remains of the drink, before reaching for Lumen's arm*

Lumen: *pours her a fill of the 'Amarula' energon drink* How much are you willing bet 'Mia yells at us for wasting all these minerals on our shells? *laughs as he leads her out of the room*

((co-written with random_xtras))